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Dirty Politics, the solution to the economic downturn

Uncle SamHi Everyone!

You know, I think that I’ve figured out the most effective way to stimulate the economy (short of going to war).  All you need to do is schedule a national election and create some initial interest and controversy with sound bites like:

  • This election may produce a major shift in power! Or,
  • A new, extremist group is gaining momentum that will threaten (or save… depending on your persuasion) our way of life!

Then, add to it a list of candidates that “apparently” include liars, thieves, witches, people that would kick a dog and those that would steal candy from babies.

Combining all of the ingredients appears to create the perfect recipe for a great economic stimulus program.  To support my point, ask yourself what you got in yesterday’s mail, what sort of billboards are in your neighborhood and along your drive, and what commercials you have seen or heard over the last several weeks.  Here’s what it has been like for me:

  • My mail has been littered with political flyers for (or most often against) a particular candidate or election referendum.  Yesterday I got twelve pieces of mail and ten were from political candidates or interest groups.
  • I can’t count the number of signs in my neighborhood and along my drive (by the way I’d really like to know what benefit is derived from having twelve signs for the same candidate all lined up in a row spread over a distance of less than twenty yards).
  • As for political commercials all I can say is “Thank God for my DVR and my fast forward button!”

Just think of the wonders that this is doing for our economy!  Printers, production companies, actors, television stations, television networks, news programs, radio stations, mail men, post offices, paper mills, photographers, newspapers, garbage men, landfills, video rentals, and private investigators (to name a few) all must be doing a booming business right now digging up dirt, publicizing dirt, delivering dirt or providing an alternative to weary voters desperate to escape the dirt!  Just think of the enormous influx of cash going into our economy?!  Bottom line, I think that we need to postpone next week’s election to insure this stimulation of our economy continues.  We cannot afford for the election season to end!!!

All kidding aside, I must admit that I’m very concerned by the amount of money that has been wasted on this election.  Heck, if the money that has been spent on the election had been applied to the debt we may have actually been able to cover a few of the interest payments to China.  In addition, in watching the campaigns that are going on around the United States I wish there was an option to vote “none of the above, find someone else”.

Sadly, our situation does not appear to be unique to present day.  I’m reminded that the ancient Greek philosopher Diogenes who use to wander about in full daylight with a lantern… searching for an honest man.

What has your experience been during this election season?


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